Le Violon d'Ingres (Ingres's Violin), 1924 by Man Ray housed at the J. Paul Getty Museum |
I ripped stitches today
from old pleated crescendo
end of movement's maybe
start of another movement's maybe
slavery to guarded
never wise started
bane frivolous souls like mine
are greedy motherfuckers
and we never learn in time
today I argued
for what felt
a final time
with my wife
we both shouted
there is no love here
save altruism in
adhesive ritual children
it has been this way
for some time now
economics and voodoo we do
pushing us under one roof
though who am I kidding
I'm the goof who probably
never gave a shit enough
to capture the melody
past courtship
it is as if I were
locking myself away
to save for the rainy day
but I wasn't leaving my cave
just staving off giving up
who I was
who I am
when falling
poet, a single
dad almost
drowning
in almost(s)
and what ifs
though it's plain to see
I 'm fucking lost
but at least I know
to smell for the angels now
demons you say...?
I was born
covered in their scent...
left hand cavatina
and the mountains
opened up
all my memories
spilled forth
piper laughing
busy collecting
the expressions
on each fold
of my faces
EJR ©
"end of movement's maybe"
ReplyDeleteI love how it was going along so beautifully, but then you started talking about your potty activities. ;)
I'm so glad to know who you really are, under all this. I mean, you're both. All of the above. Lots of complex organisms inside. But I'm so glad to know more of you than just what meets the sigh.
This is my favorite part: "I'm the goof" ... This is who you really are, and it's beautiful. All that other stuff you believe about yourself is just a lie. I mean, a little bit true. But you know, the mommy stuff; it's legit. Really, who isn't just a hurt/damaged little girl or boy trying to survive the big, bad world? You have a lot of friends who will support you through this difficult transition. Good vibes, Edward. They're all around you. I know you feel them.
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