poem 167 of a poem a day for 2012

insanity on my shoulder

so we dance

a little pirouette

and we are so enrapt

with each other

we forget to inoculate

against apathy

and so we are here

at the edge of nothing more

to want in every window

that is becoming another closed door

as my body and soul

keeps hitting every bottom

as if I am a one act play

as if I am a thread bare day

as if I am only simple expression  

as if I am the infinite longing between seasons

my insanity knows I want

to mouth everything

and swallow nothing more

that I want to eat every intention

to be somewhere else

to be someone else

my insanity knows every time

I am the whore

and my own customer too

my insanity knows this

knows why my crawling is blind

knows what the fear in my heart does

knows there is always something

I never let the world be part of

knows there may be no way inside

everything I hide behind

when I cry songs of why

can’t I too feel being Loved

beyond the flat ocean monsters of two dimensions

with my etch-a-sketch memory implant

my insanity knows

I am holed up watching

what withering

in a silent reaching

for a piece of time will do

to cut me into paper-hearted grafted vines

of cast footprints in some eternally seeded afterbirth

fading into a mantled free will

that I, with a torch carried desire

will always want to

slow burn myself through

rusting like an old felled tree

giving back Love

for some other way to know

who I am

EJR ©